We live in the future. Every want or need is taken care of for us here in the modern wold. The only thing left is for us to find a way to do everything bigger and better. The solution is a life of luxury. American life is a good life. Almost everyone can afford to get a car. We have enough food to eat. We have running water, supermarkets, and televisions all over. Your hard earned dollars can buy so many things with just access to a computer and a few minutes of online shopping or going to a warehouse store. Knowing that, you need to spend smart in order to maximize your buying power. Here's what to avoid.
1. Homeopathic Remedies
Homeopathic remedies are the luxurious way of saying you're so healthy, you feel you can fake it until you make it. They do absolutely nothing for your health or well being. Studies have disproven them time and time again. Spending money on a product that does nothing yet claims to do something is the ultimate luxury. The most it will ever do is have a placebo effect. you're essentially spending money for a box to tell you that you feel better and to stop asking questions.
2. Star Tours
You know what makes for a lousy gift? A piece of paper. You know what's slightly more insulting? A piece of paper that claims you own an intangible gas mass millions of miles away. Star naming is a puzzling and elitist trend that no one should partake in. The sheer vanity of believing once can own a piece of the sky should be satisfying enough with out the hastily printed scam sheet.
3. Smile
What's a great way to show off your wealth? How about bejewled teeth? Celebrities are all about making their moths as shiny and opulent as every other facet of their lives. Whether it's getting a golden grill to put over your real teeth, getting dazzling jeweled fillings, or straight up getting diamond teeth, no material is too gaudy to put in the center of your talk space. Consulting any oral surgeon with this request will net you an exasperated professional and the warning that the amendments will wear out your natural teeth rapidly. But you don't care, you're rich.
4. Psychics
Psychics are people that profit from fear, insecurity, and a sense of righteousness. If you want a luxury, try wasting money on an individual that claims to have comprehensive though vaguely described knowledge of your past, present, and future. You're paying a random person to throw educated guesses at you, with the difference that they have incense and maybe a crystal ball. Any and all luck or misfortune you've suffered can be explained with logic and reason. If you feel like you need a psychic, just realize that the universe simply doesn't care for you.
5. Heavy Metal, with Lite Cream
There's a new subset of the ultra luxurious: foodies with too much money for their own good. With the Food Network and the Travel Channel both available on basic cable, inspiration for places to go and food to eat is everywhere. The new trend is edible gold. You can, for thousands of dollars, take the equivalent of your ground up grandmothers welling ring and put it on your ice cream sundae. You will literally be the goose that lays the golden eggs. Pretty soon, you can probably get sauteed platinum with side of fried diamonds to go with it. Why not?
6. Welcome to the Jungle
Perhaps the cruelest luxury item is the exotic pet. Imagine the novelty of a giant, easy to kill child with the need for care and expense greater than anything else in your life. That's what an exotic pet is. Tiger, peacock, Tasmanian tiger, deep sea angler fish, all of them are expensive and foolhardy to try to tame. The reason animals in zoos survive is that there are highly trained people in charge of them 24/7. If you're a rich person with a need for novelty, you'll soon have just another dead animal on your hands. It manages to be a wasteful luxury on quite a few fronts.
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